So we have just come back from voting in this great nation. An early vote is a good vote and I enjoyed the fact I only got attacked by 4 separate parties and 300 signs on the way into the early polling booth. I have been very quiet through this election and that is on purpose because the parties who are running are doing a good enough job to make themselves look like dickheads without me having to point out the obvious. BUT then I see yesterday the old red headed lesbian and KRUDD all being nice to each other at the launch of the backstabbing bloke who knifed both of them. Made me giggle standing next to the bloke who announced the recession we had to have. The whole thing is Laughable.
On the way I went past 47signs (yep counted them) for Stuart Robert the local LNP candidate in our area and they were in at least 15 illegal (ask the council) zoned areas. My wife would not let me knock any down or any of the other ones either. Sad but true. I was looking for the Monty Brewster Vote None of the Above but it was nowhere to be seen. Just some hippies with Vote Greens slip and leather shoes on their mobile phones. It was noticeable that there were zero signs of Little Bill just his candidates maybe they are concerned they will lose the unloseable election!
We rock up to the desk and they ask my name, Brett McCallum. Whats you address? I tell them.
No ID required just two questions from the lady,
Are you over 18? YEP
Are you eligible to vote early? YEP
Anyway she passes me my Green slip to do the vote in the House of Reps and you have to number from 1-7. Ok seems easy to me. Then the longest single piece of paper in the history of long pieces of paper is given to me. This is the senate voting paper. You need to either put in a minimum or 1-6 above the line or 1-12 below the line or you can fill in each square with a preference.
So off to my little cardboard booth I go. The Green one was easy. Where are the Greens and Labor and make them 7 and 6 and then work back from there. Now the White Paper was a heap of fun. This thing did not even fit in the booth! I don't even have to worry about Little Bill and His crew as I only have to put in 1-6 with about 307 options. SO I am reading through them all and really this whole thing is a joke. There is no one on this ballot paper worth even voting for and then I see it. The Usual Pirate Party are on there and all the majors, Some other senators who created there own little party and then there it was there like a shining light, Help End Marijuana Prohibition (HEMP) Party. Yep the HEMP Party with the sole purpose TO bring some chill back into our lives and to actually be able to help others with medicinal Marijuana. Bang You get my VOTE!
Now the other 5 were a little bit harder. I had seen some woman named YHODI on my screen for the past 7 nights every 20 min so she annoyed me and did not get my vote. Should have left it to about 300 times a night Uncle Clive. So I went for the parties that I think can do something with the other 16 votes that they will get.
Now the mission to role the largest piece of white paper in history and my little green slip and put into the voting box. The lady helped with the Purple Plastic Ruler to shove it in as the box was full!
Why cant we not just vote on Facebook. One vote each and the winner takes all??
Here's my solution to this election:
I reckon that they should lose 100 votes for every sign that does not abide by the rules. They should lose 1000 votes for every time they lie and 10,000 votes every time they make a promise that they cannot tell you where the money comes from.
Promise - We will pay all of the old people an extra $45 per week for the rest of there life.
Money to come from - Taxing all of the same peoples superannuation so they can no longer retire on their own money we will have to pay the pension.
Rant Over. Good Luck for the next 3 years if Bill gets in and also good luck if we keep this useless lot in as well.